[13/08/2004 09:42:10] [From Rediffblogs]
It was a few days back when i had one of those sleepless nights the reasons for which vary from U.FO.'s visiting me to the frogs haunting me to god knows what.but as i sat there on my bed pondering over the events of the past few weeks i realise probably there is a reason to why this semester has begun the way it has.this small little period of my life has made me think a lot and has in a way affected a substantial change in me a change not to be seen physically but yes i know it is there.
one question has been haunting me since i don't know when it's the question that why should i share my problems with anyone why when i know that no one can help me but myself.when i know that it's your own life that is important to everyone and i have to fight my own battles.
why do i need people around me? why do i follow values and principles which will get me nothing but the tag of an emotional fool in this world and nothing else probably some niceties as well.
i fail to realise that i have built a world around me that has all the happiness for me but it's a mere mirage and nothing more and if i don't shed this skin it will cost me a lot in the years to come.it's very important to be practical in today's world and people like me don't do to well if they don't change .
i am not able to accept the fact that years i will not be important to the people round me i will not be the one they want to meet or talk to.i will not be missed and remembered when i am no more and that's the way we alla re selfish with short memories.it's easy to say i will be always there but when you realise what you said you understand it's a big deal you will find other important things to do than your friend's needs some meetin some work something or the other will come in the way.
i guess yes it's true this world is selfish and there are not many fools like me but then i can't help the fact that i still don't see any light at the end of the tunnel and no reason to change but i will find my way my path in time to come.